Let’s be honest, what number is this? Four? Seven? Ten? Don’t let semantics get in the way because it might take awhile, I keep them in order by the extra long titles. It’s not like Lethal Weapon or Alien when you ask “which one?” and you respond with a number. With Pirates of the Caribbean, you respond with “Dead Man’s Chest” or “At World’s End?”

On one hand, we’ve been given 14 years of Johnny Depp so big thanks to Disney for that. On the other, folks like me are wondering “Is this the last one?” With the latest installment in the franchise “Dead Men Tell No Tales” we’re at five films total. Rumors swirled about this being the one to finish the series but I can tell you that’s a lie (they pull a Marvel in this film so sit through the credits).

Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) is in search of the trident of Poseidon. This only comes after Henry Turner (Brenton Thwaites), son of Will Turner (Orlando Bloom), is determined to set his father free from his curse. This can only be done by finding the trident, which breaks all curses of the sea.

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Even though it’s Rated PG-13 and it’s by Disney, there’s a lot of adult humor in here. Naturally, the bulk of it comes from Captain Jack but still, it’s there.

Linking up with a rogue kid who spends his life trying to find you is a nice warming story, but that would be too simple. So here comes Captain Salazar (Javier Bardem), a man who not only knows Jack Sparrow but was upended by his trickery, cursed to forever lie in the shadows of a cave.

This 2hr and 9m adventure are much of what you’d expect. Bits of action, sprinkles of comedy, and just enough of a plot with a twist here and there to keep your attention for 129 minutes. I give Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales a 7 out of 10. It’s Memorial Day Weekend and there really aren’t any blockbusters coming this way for the holiday. Your choices are pretty much this and Baywatch so here’s what you should do. If you want to get out the house by yourself or with other adults, then you see Baywatch. If you have kids with you, then you see this (Baywatch is totally inappropriate for children). So grab your mates and a bottle of rum and prepare tales of folly!


-Jon J.


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